When I first started working with Shannon, I was single. I had tried dating apps before, but they didn't seem to connect me with the right people.
I was struggling with getting out of survival mode and focusing on what I wanted for my life.
Shannon taught me about "Foundational Qualities" - things that I should be looking for in a partner as well as what I should strive to become. I learned to identify specific things that I wanted in a partner, and reflected on how I need to possess these traits as well in order to attract the right man. I choose the following qualities: confidence, generosity, humility, humor, forgiveness, honesty, loyalty, duty, and courage.
I'm not sure if I remember the Relationship Protocol? I'll need you to chime in for this one.
After receiving coaching from Shannon, I was easily able to identify what I didn't want since I was focusing on what I did want. I was able to walk away from dates that didn't serve me, and it got easier to acknowledge when it wasn't a good fit. No more accepting/settling.
I met Chris on a dating website (Zoosk). We instantly hit it off via chat, and then went out on our first date a couple of days later.
I was able to identify the traits that I was looking for in Chris. It helped me to see that he was different than any of the other guys I dated. While we've had our struggles along the way, having a clear set of goals and standards for myself allowed me to see the big picture. I could decipher the insignificant challenges from the ones that were more important.
Navigating co-parenting relationships hasn't always been easy. Shannon helped me to pause, take a few breaths before responding,and try to change my perspective on situations.
During my time with Shannon, one of my favorite exercises was the one in which she had us make a vision board. We were tasked with putting thought into where do we want to be in the next few years, and what do we want our life to look like. I included pictures of a couple hiking to waterfalls, family dinners, a cruise ship, canada, eating healthy and exercise to focus on my well being, and books to continue to learn. I'm happy to report that all of these things have came true! I feel like I focused on what I wanted, put it to paper to ensure I would have a visual, and then it stayed in the forefront of my mind. Without Shannon, I may have stayed stuck in survival mode instead of flourishing into a new chapter of life.
“ I would tell any single parents out there to get clear on what you are looking for! Make a list of all the qualities that are a priority - not his looks, but his character. Figure out who you want to be by your side day in, and day out. Once you actually picture what you want your life to look like, then you can write down and focus on it. Then, when you start dating, if anyone comes into your life that doesn't have those character traits, it'll be easier for you to walk away. Without a list, it's easy to settle.